e x t r e m i t y

it’s funny how life works, isn’t it? we’re born, live a life not knowing anything...

Fri, 09 Nov 2012 23:15:01 -0800

it’s funny how life works, isn’t it?

we’re born, live a life not knowing anything about any bit of our future. always told “you must create your future yourself, you must take action to make change” but what if something unexpected happens? what if you’re so sure everything’s fine and everything going well, then bam..disaster. Something goes awry and nothing’s according to plan.

We live, then we die. And for some reason it just doesn’t sit well with me. Lately, a lot of the time, I just think…”What’s the point? I’ll be dead someday, why does this matter?” But the point is to make something of the time that you’re given. And try to make the most of it. It sucks that death is something that’ll never be escaped. It’s the most terrifying thing to me. And it’s what keeps me up at night.

I hardly use this blog, but I need an outlet aside from my other one to just talk and release my feelings. I need to feel better & I need to be at peace with how the way works, otherwise I’ll just drive myself into insanity. And what’s fun about that?

Hi. I never post here. Bye.

Sat, 21 Jul 2012 23:52:58 -0700

Hi.

I never post here.

Bye.

I haven’t really posted on this one much lately. Well….it’s been a while. And all...

Sat, 17 Mar 2012 20:13:05 -0700

I haven’t really posted on this one much lately.

Well….it’s been a while. And all I can say since the last time I’ve been on is……I’ve become very scandalous. Whoops.

-___________________________________-

Thu, 29 Dec 2011 01:05:23 -0800

can I escape here, pleeease

Thu, 29 Dec 2011 00:38:32 -0800

can I escape here, pleeease

R A N T

Thu, 29 Dec 2011 00:20:59 -0800

I haven’t done a good rant in a while.

Friends make me upset. This is why I’d like to basically have acquaintances. Because, you think someone is your ultimate #1 bestfriend. Then, it changes. I mean, sure I might be overreacting. But when you expect something, then they go back on it, what do you expect? You expect your friends to be there all of the time. And it sucks when you’re proven otherwise. I’m sure this will all blow over within the next few days. But for now, I am still upset. You can never be too sure about someone, because when you least expect it, things will do a 180. So disappointing. Friends are just….well, friend is such a strong and powerful word. Has so much meaning to it, if you’re considered to be someone’s friend rather than acquaintance, don’t take it for granted. Cherish the friendship’s you have and do what you’d expect a friend to do for you. Be a good one.

I haven’t masturbated in over a week. What. Is there something wrong with me? There must be...

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 20:17:29 -0800

I haven’t masturbated in over a week. What.

Is there something wrong with me? There must be something wrong with me. I don’t even want to either. What. I don’t. Whatever.

The Holiday Season

Sat, 24 Dec 2011 12:53:15 -0800

It just doesn’t feel like the Holiday Season anymore. It hasn’t for the past few years. Like….today is Christmas Eve. I feel like it’s just Saturday. I wonder if this is something that we feel as we get older, or if it’s just something that’s been recently going on. I miss the old feeling of being so excited and feeling extreme angst for Christmas, for just the season. I hate that I can’t feel the joy for the Holiday season any longer, I miss being a kid with the greatest excitement for this.

jarrodis: (by giant!)

Sat, 24 Dec 2011 11:51:41 -0800

jarrodis:

(by giant!)

I would really appreciate this in my possession.

Fri, 23 Dec 2011 11:08:49 -0800

I would really appreciate this in my possession.

orientaltiger: (by ryan furbush)

Fri, 23 Dec 2011 01:35:59 -0800

orientaltiger:

(by ryan furbush)

Being a Coach.

Fri, 23 Dec 2011 01:30:20 -0800

I started coaching Drill Team when I was in 8th grade. I was only 12 years old. A coach, basically on my own at such a young age. It was only two years before that I had been participating on the team I was now the leader of. Becoming coach became a new part of me. It made me appreciate what I had the passion for only incredibly more.
I went on to become undefeated for 3 years, 10th grade was my final year coaching. It tore me apart.
I didn’t know what to do, I mean, I was on another team, but I loved being there for those kids who had something to look forward to everyday. A place to go and do what they loved to do, and for free. It was the best feeling knowing I could give those kids a satisfying love for something unique and different.

This is my 2nd year not coaching anything anymore and it absolutely kills me. I miss it so much. I want to go back, but how will I? I’ll be off to College next year, I won’t be anywhere in the area to coach. Then, i’ll be fulfilling my career and then the rest of my life. I feel like it’s now, or never again for this. I’m thinking of starting a new team now, just for this year, and then leaving it to someone else who wants to take control of it next year.

I just need to do it while I can basically. I miss it so dearly, and I miss my girls and I miss everything about Coaching. Just give it back to me, it gave me a fulfilling feeling that I can’t compare. It’s almost as great a feeling as performing myself.
I miss the day before first competition, making sure my team has their stuff on lock. I miss the morning of first comp, or any comp, meeting at the school and getting into uniform, hair and makeup. Arriving at our Competition and watching all of the other teams. Prepping my team right before they perform, pumping them up as they enter the floor. Getting them into ready position and then rooting and screaming throughout the whole performance, like the proud papa that I become. Those are my kids, they instantly become mine. I’ve created a team, but most importantly a family that continues to know, love and remember each other for forever.

I miss it all.

mmicaah: the way she hits all the moves thoo. i wish i could...

Thu, 22 Dec 2011 22:34:43 -0800

mmicaah:

the way she hits all the moves thoo.

i wish i could be as inspirational as her. what a great performer and dancer she is. same with brian actually. they’re both great.

how beautiful.

Thu, 22 Dec 2011 20:58:11 -0800

how beautiful.

A lot of filming goes on at my school

Thu, 22 Dec 2011 20:43:11 -0800

freelanceof-art:

Movies:

Billie

Pretty Maids All in a Row

Jawbreaker

Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth,

Bruce Almighty

The Battle of Shaker Heights

Raise Your Voice

Surviving Christmas

The Hot Chick

Freedom Writers

Drillbit Taylor

Superhero Movie

Pineapple Express

Miss March, 2008

Valentine’s Day

Detention

TV Shows:

My So-Called Life

Oliver Beene

7th Heaven

Even Stevens

Joan of Arcadia

Parenthood

Arrested Development

The Flannerys

High School Undercover

JAG

Filmore Middle

Day Break

The Division

Privileged

90210

Lincoln Heights

Ghost Whisperer

Amazing Stories

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Modern Family

Music videos:

Crystal Method - Name of The Game

JoJo - Leave (Get Out)

I am starting a more personal blog, where I post more about my life and what I’m up to, etc. I...

Thu, 22 Dec 2011 20:25:06 -0800

I am starting a more personal blog, where I post more about my life and what I’m up to, etc.
I personally think/thought that personal blogs were weird, because isn’t your blog yours and supposed to be personal? But, as I browse my other page, I see it’s mostly just photos, statements, etc, that I can find interest in. Not so much of me just posting about me. So, this is the beginning of it! It’s not to gain followers or become popular, it’s just somewhere for me to be completely me.